PREACH A SERMON, PREACHER

(Or Hypocrite's Delight)

Preach a sermon, Preacher, but don't preach very long;

Just tell a heart-warming story, but don't condemn the wrong.

Say not a thing about specific problems,

Because that's something we don't want to know.

We're just here to feel real good, so don't mess up the show

 

Preach a sermon, Preacher, but don't preach doctrine plain.

Let others guess at what is meant; don't ever call a name.

We'll sing your praises loud and long, and keep you many a day,

But preach it clear and you will hear, "Brother, be on your way."

 

Preach a sermon, Preacher, but say nothing of our duty,

Tell us all about God's grace, and picture Heaven's beauty.

Leave out things that we must do, we're busy making money;

Keep it short and off the point, and make it sweet as honey.

 

Preach a sermon, Preacher, but say nothing of our sins;

Don't speak of hell, repentance, or other stuff that offends.

Tell us about how Jesus loves each and everyone,

And how He'll forgive us, no matter how our lives are run.

 

Preach a sermon, Preacher, but make sure we're entertained.

With the right technique, there's sure to be new converts to be gained.

Tell us about church youth programs and our gospel band,

With these we're sure to win more souls, and give our Lord a hand.

 

Preach a sermon, Preacher, and speak of the day we die,

Tell all the folks about our home beyond the starry sky.

Preach a sermon, Preacher, make it strong, preach us straight to Heaven,

Tell us that since we have church membership, we get eternal living.

Dr. W.R. Crews from 'Playing Church," third printing July 1982

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